So after missing my morning bus a few times because I am NOT a morning person and very lazy with getting ready on time...I discovered that the AU shuttle picks up near my house and goes to the Metro. Lucky for me, I can still pass for a college student (lets be honest, I can still pass for a high school student), So I've started taking the shuttle in the morning.. the best part is that its FREE. YAY!
Well this morning, something happened that would only happen in college and made my morning! There was a girl, looked to be about 19. She had a low cut, short red dress on and looked a little disheveled. I didn't think much of it until I sat down a few seats behind her and looked again. What caught my eye was that she was BAREFOOT. I thought to myself, "Oh. My. Gosh. How gross." These buses aren't particularly clean and they're kind of rickety. All I could do was stare and her brown, dirty feet on the floor.
I started looking around at the other people on the bus to see if anyone else had noticed this, but I apparently was alone in my horror. When we got to her stop, she stumbled up and briefly lost her balance, leading me to the assumption that she was probably still drunk (at 7:45am on a Thursday). I watched her, expecting to see wedges or heels in her hands, but all she had with her was a brown handbag. NO SHOES anywhere in sight. She proceeded to strut down the aisle of the bus and exit and walked (stumbled) down the street, hopefully to her house.
The best part was that at the front of the bus were students wearing matching red t-shirts on some kind of "get to know DC tour", maybe part of AU orientation? All you could hear was them muttering, "ohmygod, she isn't wearing shoes!" or "Was that girl barefoot??!" or "What was that girl doing?"
I wanted to look at all of them and say, "Welcome to College--the only time in your life when behavior like this is excusable." But I didn't. I just smirked to myself and remembered doing the walk of shame myself on occasion. At least in Tallahassee you didn't have to use public transportation to get home!
I was left with this question-- Where on earth was that poor girl's shoes?! Why did she leave in such a hurry that she had a Dane Cook moment and said, "Nah, F*#$ Shoes!" #onlyincollege.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Rules of MetroLand
It seems to me that in addition to the "No Eating/Drinking/Smoking/Playing music/Leaning on doors" signs that are posted throughout the trains, there should be survival skills signs. Here is how they would look:
If you want to survive on the Metro and not get pushed/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared you should:
1. Be alert. If someone is coming towards you quickly, natural instincts should tell you to move...fast.
2. Be considerate. Let the elderly, pregnant, and women wearing heels sit. Move out of the way of people who look stressed and are clearly in a hurry. Don't talk on your cell-phone or carry on a conversation with your BFFL--unless you've mastered the concept of "inside voices"--which I'm coming to realize is evidently, a rare talent.
3. Leave your baby at home. Don't take this the wrong way, but if your child is not old enough to be carried (or walk) and must be pushed around in a large double-decker stroller on hydraulic monster wheels (which is exactly what they look like when they're taking up half the standing room in the train car), then the Metro is probably not the best means of transportation for you. If you must bring your child and its huge stroller, I direct your attention to Rule #2 and ask you to be considerate and fold the stroller up until you get off the train.
4. Move all the way into the car. Do not congregate around the door, this does not allow people to board or depart the train--Thus, enhancing the likelihood that you will get pushed/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared.
5. Walk with a purpose. I get it: You're on vacation with your 5 million children, out for an exciting trip on the Metro. Great, awesome, good for you. This does not however, mean that you get to meander out of the doorways and then stop. Dead in your tracks. Deer in head lights look on your faces. Unless of course, you want to get pushed/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared. Or all of the above, simultaneously. The doors only open for a certain amount of time so do the rest of us a favor and walk-- briskly-- out of the way and figure out where you're going in some corner. AND FINALLY...
6. STAND ON THE RIGHT, WALK ON THE LEFT! This is probably the most heinous of offenses. If you are going to treat the escalators as some sort of amusement park ride, then kindly stand on the right hand side so as to allow those of us with places to go and people to see and JOBS to get to.. enough room to walk up or run down the stairs. If you don't adhere to this rule you will probably get pushed (or aaggressively tapped)/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared, or some combination thereof. Moreover, on the subject of the escalators, I also direct your attention back to Rule #5 and encourage you to walk with a purpose once your ride up or down is complete. Do not stop at the top or bottom and cause a domino effect of people running into you simply because you do not know what to do next.
I promise you, if everyone followed these rules, MetroLand would be a much less scary place for all. =)
If you want to survive on the Metro and not get pushed/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared you should:
1. Be alert. If someone is coming towards you quickly, natural instincts should tell you to move...fast.
2. Be considerate. Let the elderly, pregnant, and women wearing heels sit. Move out of the way of people who look stressed and are clearly in a hurry. Don't talk on your cell-phone or carry on a conversation with your BFFL--unless you've mastered the concept of "inside voices"--which I'm coming to realize is evidently, a rare talent.
3. Leave your baby at home. Don't take this the wrong way, but if your child is not old enough to be carried (or walk) and must be pushed around in a large double-decker stroller on hydraulic monster wheels (which is exactly what they look like when they're taking up half the standing room in the train car), then the Metro is probably not the best means of transportation for you. If you must bring your child and its huge stroller, I direct your attention to Rule #2 and ask you to be considerate and fold the stroller up until you get off the train.
4. Move all the way into the car. Do not congregate around the door, this does not allow people to board or depart the train--Thus, enhancing the likelihood that you will get pushed/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared.
5. Walk with a purpose. I get it: You're on vacation with your 5 million children, out for an exciting trip on the Metro. Great, awesome, good for you. This does not however, mean that you get to meander out of the doorways and then stop. Dead in your tracks. Deer in head lights look on your faces. Unless of course, you want to get pushed/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared. Or all of the above, simultaneously. The doors only open for a certain amount of time so do the rest of us a favor and walk-- briskly-- out of the way and figure out where you're going in some corner. AND FINALLY...
6. STAND ON THE RIGHT, WALK ON THE LEFT! This is probably the most heinous of offenses. If you are going to treat the escalators as some sort of amusement park ride, then kindly stand on the right hand side so as to allow those of us with places to go and people to see and JOBS to get to.. enough room to walk up or run down the stairs. If you don't adhere to this rule you will probably get pushed (or aaggressively tapped)/yelled at/cursed at/ or death-stared, or some combination thereof. Moreover, on the subject of the escalators, I also direct your attention back to Rule #5 and encourage you to walk with a purpose once your ride up or down is complete. Do not stop at the top or bottom and cause a domino effect of people running into you simply because you do not know what to do next.
I promise you, if everyone followed these rules, MetroLand would be a much less scary place for all. =)
Monday, June 27, 2011
The Adventures of Peri in MetroLand...
As you may have picked up on, I have chosen an Alice in Wonderland (Original title: The Adventures of Alice in Wonderland) theme for my very first blog. I have a few reasons for doing so: First, I can definitely relate to Alice..what with her poofy dress, white stalkings, and black bow in her hair--this is a look my mother loved to dress my sister and I in; Second, My favorite ride at Disney is the Teacups!
But most importantly, the reason I chose this theme is because there are in fact, many parallels between Wonderland and what I have come to think of as MetroLand. Let me paint a picture for you: You are very tired, it is very early in the morning, and you are "late...for a very important date"--okay its just work, but go with me here... You hear the sound of footsteps behind you and turn and see a white rabbit running while staring at a pocket watch (okay, its a business man in a suit). You're already disoriented by being in a new place and a lack of sleep and caffeine, when you stumble onto the escalator (which of course, is out of order) and begin to descend into "the rabbit hole"...further and further down the broken escalator you run, until at last you reach "MetroLand".
MetroLand is a peculiar place. It is dark, clammy, people are shoving free newspapers in your face. Once you swipe your SmartTrip card and walk through the narrow entryway to the station, you have reached the point of no return. MetroLand is a world populated by peculiar creatures. You never know what to expect. If you aren't vigilant you could have your Blackberry, iPod, Kindle, or iPad stolen from you; People may push you out of the way as they run to board their train. And then, if it isn't already strange enough--you board your train and for however long your journey is, you are stuck in a car with those creatures and have no way out. This is where things really get interesting.
"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."
(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6)
The Cat was right. They are all mad--and commute long enough and you become mad too. After your train ride is complete and you arrive at the next Metro station, the fun part begins. Which exit do I take? Which way to the bus stop?
Ask an attendant and you might get a response similar to this:
"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.
"I don’t much care where--" said Alice.
"Then it doesn’t matter which way you go," said the Cat.
"--so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation.
"Oh, you’re sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."
(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6)
Ask a local and you may be lucky enough to get a clear answer such as this:
Doorknob: "Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction."(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland)
The moral of the story is that MetroLand is an adventure in and of itself, especially for a girl who had a car from the time she was 16 until recently, never had to walk to get anywhere, and never rode a city bus in her life. If Alice could make it through the Mad Hatter's Tea Party, the Queen of Heart's Croquet game, and an encounter with a high Caterpillar... Then this Mad Temp-er can make it through MetroLand! :)
But most importantly, the reason I chose this theme is because there are in fact, many parallels between Wonderland and what I have come to think of as MetroLand. Let me paint a picture for you: You are very tired, it is very early in the morning, and you are "late...for a very important date"--okay its just work, but go with me here... You hear the sound of footsteps behind you and turn and see a white rabbit running while staring at a pocket watch (okay, its a business man in a suit). You're already disoriented by being in a new place and a lack of sleep and caffeine, when you stumble onto the escalator (which of course, is out of order) and begin to descend into "the rabbit hole"...further and further down the broken escalator you run, until at last you reach "MetroLand".
MetroLand is a peculiar place. It is dark, clammy, people are shoving free newspapers in your face. Once you swipe your SmartTrip card and walk through the narrow entryway to the station, you have reached the point of no return. MetroLand is a world populated by peculiar creatures. You never know what to expect. If you aren't vigilant you could have your Blackberry, iPod, Kindle, or iPad stolen from you; People may push you out of the way as they run to board their train. And then, if it isn't already strange enough--you board your train and for however long your journey is, you are stuck in a car with those creatures and have no way out. This is where things really get interesting.
"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."
(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6)
The Cat was right. They are all mad--and commute long enough and you become mad too. After your train ride is complete and you arrive at the next Metro station, the fun part begins. Which exit do I take? Which way to the bus stop?
Ask an attendant and you might get a response similar to this:
"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.
"I don’t much care where--" said Alice.
"Then it doesn’t matter which way you go," said the Cat.
"--so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation.
"Oh, you’re sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."
(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6)
Ask a local and you may be lucky enough to get a clear answer such as this:
Doorknob: "Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction."(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland)
The moral of the story is that MetroLand is an adventure in and of itself, especially for a girl who had a car from the time she was 16 until recently, never had to walk to get anywhere, and never rode a city bus in her life. If Alice could make it through the Mad Hatter's Tea Party, the Queen of Heart's Croquet game, and an encounter with a high Caterpillar... Then this Mad Temp-er can make it through MetroLand! :)
Friday, June 24, 2011
First Post!
This week I started a new job as a Temp and boy has it been an interesting week! I live in DC and commute to Maryland for work (yeah, I know thats kind of backwards). This involves waking up by 5:45am and being at the Metro bus stop by 7:05am. Once the bus drops me off at the Metro Rail station I take a 20 minute ride to Maryland, where I catch yet another bus to arrive at my office by 8:00am!
All this commuting has given me plenty of practice in navigating the VERY complicated system of buses and trains that make up the DC Metro system (WMATA). Every day when I arrive home I have a story about "what happened on the Metro today".
Last night while telling one of my stories, I interupted myself and said, "Ya know? I should really write a blog about this..." To which my Aunt replied, through fits of laughter, "Yes, yes you should!" So here goes nothing!
All this commuting has given me plenty of practice in navigating the VERY complicated system of buses and trains that make up the DC Metro system (WMATA). Every day when I arrive home I have a story about "what happened on the Metro today".
Last night while telling one of my stories, I interupted myself and said, "Ya know? I should really write a blog about this..." To which my Aunt replied, through fits of laughter, "Yes, yes you should!" So here goes nothing!
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